It is so easy to dwell on the negative. But doing so eats us away from the inside. We then become bitter people, snapping quick responses to the people closest to us, and turning into a person no one wants to be around. I fully admit I have to be intentional about being the positive person when I just feel like being my sassy self. As my mother (and probably most mothers) once said – “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all!”
And then there are those times when circumstances get way out of control way too fast. Moms, raise your hand if that’s happened in your household. (If you didn’t raise your hand, you’re bluffing!) One morning last week, I was running behind. Stop, wait. That’s normal. Let’s start over. One morning last week, I was rushing to get ready as usual because I always hit snooze one too many times. My daughter had to be at school early, so I skip my morning exercises and bring her quickly, only 1 minute late (okay, maybe 4 minutes late by the time she gets into class). When I arrive back home, my son is screaming about injuring his toe. How on earth did this happen??!? When I left to go to school (only 2½ minutes away), he was fascinated with a 9-inch-long earthworm that had found its way onto our driveway after the previous night’s rain. While I was out, he proceeded to retrieve a small beach bucket and shovel. He then put some dirt in the bucket, scooped up the earthworm, and beamed at finding himself his new pet. He placed the bucket behind our front bush, and went back inside the house. For some reason, he chose to wear my shoes outside. After he kicked and flung them off his feet (because that’s the way boys usually take off their shoes), he swung his foot back down and scraped his toe against the floor. A flap of skin the size of a thumbnail came loose and he was starting to bleed. Enter Mom.
Mom: “What’s going on??”
K: “WAAAAA! I hurt my toe!! It hurts so much!!! WAAA!!”
Mom: “How did this happen?”
K: “I FOUND A WORM AND AND AND THE SHOE CAME OFF MY FOOT AND AND IT HURTS!!”
Mom: “Let’s take a look, sit down.” discovers flap of skin and blood, retrieves clippers to cut off flap
K: “NNNOOOOOOOOOO!!! Wait, Mom, just just let me ask you one thing!! Noo, Mom, DON’T!” wiggles his toes constantly
After spending only 2 minutes trying to look at his bleeding appendage, I know that this process could go on for at least 45 minutes based on the warts he dealt with a few months ago. I then grab a Band-Aid, tell him to put it on himself or else bleed through his sock, and finish getting ready. For the next 10 minutes, a wailing child begs to be excused from gym class and complains how much the Band-Aid is bothering him. We manage to remember a snack (thank goodness it’s hot lunch day) and arrive at school with red puffy eyes. He immediately goes to his gym teacher on playground duty and pleads his case for as long as I can see until I leave the school driveway. At the end of the day, he actually did participate in gym class and even managed to remove the skin flap by himself after school.
Needless to say, I was a little flustered upon arriving to my desk at work. Mornings are rarely smooth in our household. We really need to get our act together. But where am I going with this? I could let this distraction really bother me and affect how I interact with my coworkers throughout the day. Or I can find the good. My son was only 4 years only when my mom passed away. But even in the preschool years, my mother knew from her many years of working with elementary children that my son would make a good lawyer. So, I remember what my mom predicted. I reframe his arguments to consider them creative ways to produce a desired result. And maybe he’ll win a few cases in court someday.